Post written by guest blogger Emily Grugan; OITE Program Assistant
“Not life, but good life, is to be chiefly valued” – Socrates
Each of us hopes to live a fulfilling life. But what does that mean? What is a fulfilling life? Philosophers across the ages have written on the subject (see link above to read more on Socrates’ take). There are many ongoing modern debates as well. Ultimately, though, it is up to you to decide. You get to determine what will constitute a “good life”, one you can, in the words of Socrates, chiefly value.
It’s a hefty question to consider, but you can start with thinking about your goals. We often think of these in the short term – a week or a semester. If it is a long-term goal, it is often still only of a year or even a 5-year timeframe (like completing graduate school). However, it isn’t as often that we sit down and consider our lives in their entirety. What are your ultimate goals? In your final days, what do you want to look back and see you have done? If you got a graduate degree, what did you do with it? What was the final tip of the scales between your time spent at work and with family? Did you ever write that book you’ve been thinking about or produce that song? When you imagine those final days, how many children did you have that are then gathered around you? Was your house the place that family came to for holidays and birthdays or were you out traveling abroad? What kind of traits did you exemplify – were you kind, peaceful, generous, forgiving?
As the answers to these questions begin to paint a picture in your mind, consider what they tell you about your values.
Of course, we cannot guarantee the fruition of the mental picture we painted. We can’t control all the things that will happen to us – what career opportunities will be available, what kind of circumstances or challenges we will face with our spouses or families (though, arguably, that is part of the fun and ultimately the whole point – but that is a blog post for another day). However, we can control our moment-to-moment decisions in response to these things. We do this best by understanding our values.
For example, if in the mental painting of your “good life” you imagined a version of yourself that prioritized a balance between work and family time, you can have a better sense of direction when considering potential job opportunities. Between a job that pays more but also demands a 60+ hour work week, and one that has a lower salary but prioritizes schedule flexibility and off time for employees, you can experience less indecision. At a crossroads of this nature, you are confidently guided by the compass of your values and choose the latter option. On the other hand, if you envisioned financial success, perhaps the ability to pass on a particular sum to your children or grandchildren, you might feel more peace in the face of the hours sacrificed towards work that you will have to make in earning it.
These are only two simple examples. But engaging with your life in this way across its domains (personal, social, spiritual, as well as professional) can give you a sense of purpose and peace. When life gets messy, when you’re unsure of how to prioritize your time, what career to pursue, what paths to take in a social conflict, you can find guidance and groundedness in your values and knowing where you’re ultimately headed. Reflect continuously on your chosen direction and the alignment of your progress towards it.
Your idea of a good life may change over the years, but continuing to live in accordance with the values of which it is comprised will always foster a sense of peace and fulfillment, no matter the bumps along the way.
