Last week’s blog post imparted some Tips for Finding Balance. The most common piece of advice around finding that elusive work-life balance was setting proper boundaries – set designated time and space for your professional and personal time and even time for electronics like email/social media.
One way to help protect boundaries is to learn to say no more often. Most of us say yes way too often. We say yes to meetings we didn’t need to attend; we say yes to things that simply aren’t a priority for us. Often times, we feel like we have to say yes, and we want to be seen as helpful. However, saying yes to everything makes it much harder to be in control of our time and our schedule.
You don’t need to say no to everything, but it is important to be more selective about what you say yes to. Before agreeing to that next task/commitment, take a moment to think more critically about what you are saying yes to. Truly assess the time commitment and if you are able to take that on.
A simple framework is: say yes to things you want to do, have to do, or things that get you closer to your own goals. You should say no to most other things.
At work, though, there are many things that we just have to do and so I know many of you are thinking, “How do I say no to my boss?” Here are two approaches you can use in a professional setting.
1. Okay I can work with you on that, but what should I deprioritize?
It is important to realize that when you say yes to something, you are also saying no to other things/other ways you could have spent that time. Your messaging should be respectful and courteous, but it is your responsibility as an employee to track your projects and ensure that the quality of your work won’t be impacted. Understand that there is often a tradeoff and make sure your boss realizes this as well.
2. Say no and offer an alternative.
Some examples of how this could look include: “I won’t be able to make that meeting, but feel free to keep me posted on the key takeaways.” Or “I won’t be able to help with that project, but it might be worth checking in with X.”
Ultimately, we are in charge of our schedules and have to find ways to manage our time effectively. Learning to say no can be a helpful tool in accomplishing this.
